Idle kids or busy bees?

When parents come to ask for advice for their kid, they may spill out truths they even don’t understand.These truths are usually the reason why their kid doesn’t perform well at school but what it really happens is parents’ inability or indecision if you like to take over the situation and help their “petit-chou” as the French say, meaning their adorable/ little darling. Admitting that your kid is “idle” seems ok but when really thinking of it it may seem acceptance of a greater issue that of nurturing your kid’s disposition or even safeguarding his childhood under the excuse of “I can’t do anything to help him, the next step is laziness.” Well, that’s bad news for all of us and especially for the kid.When i started teaching on a daily basis then running my own school I was puzzled of the syptoms of idleness which the majority of students showed, no matter what the activity or task was.The educational system was and still is a good excuse with all the vices it comprises but there is a huge “But” here.

Having to face idleness in class is the worst thing to happen because: a) the funny excuses used by students to persuade me, their teacher, about idleness are out of this world and  b) they fall behind in class , taking  more students in their whirpool .at the same time.

But this “but” comes back all the time and you know what, as John Lubbock (30 April 1834 – 28 May 1913), known as Sir John Lubbock, 4th Baronet from 1865 until 1900,  a banker, Liberal politician, philanthropist, scientist and polymath stated:

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Have you ever thought that your kid needs his own time frame and space to react and produce? There is a big blue sky waiting just behind the clouds, your kid is not ready to see the sky yet, because his vision is covered by the clouds, he is absorbed watching the clouds and he may examine them!

It’s a bad coincidence and not a universal conspiracy, your kid needs to breathe and to find the courage to focus on and make that big step to react. He is idle, yes, we agree on that but he is not lazy! I hope we agree on that ,too! Don’t feel overwhelmed, please, don’t, any teacher needs the parents’ help to see the fruits of knowledge growing.

“A man is not idle because he is absorbed in thought.  There is a visible labor and there is an invisible labor “stated Victor Hugo and he was right, trully right!

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Counterproductivity doesn’t stop when a kid is not encouraged but get threats of punishment or even indifference speaking for the parents’ part. There are good boundaries for the child to stick, the only problem is the parents have to set these boundaries and not the teacher. Encouragement thru reward but within a logical frame is the answer. The kid has to realise that there is not reward all the time, this reward has to be the proof of his promise to be consistent with his tasks and try to do his best , by controlling idleness. The family has to teach that and most importantly to teach autonomy and tame that wild cub  lion that uses idleness as an excuse.

Follow some simple steps and you will see your ‘idle’ kid to be transformed day by day.

  • Let your “petit chou” to know that your interaction with them is more important than your work, “idle” kids need your attention and they ask for it silenty.
  • Don’t use the digital worls to pacify your kids’ worries and cover the gap of communication because you create a chain of misunderstandings and believe me this web will be tangled and tangled for many years!
  • Don’t forget that your kid will grow up feeling useful when he has gained all the necessary skills that are acquired thru interaction in the real world. Examine closely your kid’s reactions and thoughts, try to find out what pleases this little adorable creature and introduce him to it.
  • If you have a plan and stick to it then your kid will enjoy the “privileges” you decide he has to.

child-standing-on-head-in-grass-350Till next Friday’s Rock Post, do you best so that your kid’s childhood doesn’t fade away thinking of himself as “idle” but teach him that having watchful eyes may be the best attribute to go on in life!

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